Desi Perkins

Desi Perkins

2 470 219 再生回数3 746

    This is a long one....but it all needed to be said. I hope this video helps anyone that's going through something similar, and to know that you're not alone. I also hope this video educates anyone who doesn't know how pregnancy questions could affect someone who's dealt or dealing with a stillbirth, miscarriages, infertility & any other pregnancy complications.
    Extending all my love to all of those who are suffering. Know that I'm here with you ❤️

    に公開 7 ヶ月 前


    1. Boston Mom

      I also struggled to get pregnant. Turns out I didn't ovulate. Doctor prescribed Clomid. Got pregnant the first month on it. Then for my second child, I took it for two months and got pregnant. It WILL happen for you!!!!! XOXO

    2. All Things Rami

      Overcoming such adversity only shows the courage you have from within. You are one of the few people I watch. My situation is different, I'm a widow but since I watched this, i felt encouraged to finally come out of my shell and start my youtube channel. I really hope one day I am brave enough to share our love story and tragedy. But for now I just create content that keeps me busy and is fun! Thank you for sharing your struggles because there are not enough real people out there and before starting my own channel that was one thing I based it on. Keeping it real! No fluff! I hope oneday my channel grows to inspire people as has yours! Thank you for being you and keeping it 100.

    3. moureen wanjiku

      Praying for you lovely lady awwww this is so heart breaking sowwiiieeee 😩😩

    4. Jazzy J

      Dammit fucked my makeup up before i was done with it

    5. Jazzy J

      You 2 are amazing together ❤

    6. Pam Friar

      Thank you for sharing such a private & hurtful part of your life I experienced the same many years ago so I seriously understand just give it to God

    7. Melissa Alanskas

      God bless you!

    8. Adrianna Dawn

      I remember watching this video the day it came out. I cried because I felt & seen the pain in your face. Here I am months later understanding your pain & crying because I am also living your pain to an extent. I pray for you & your husband. Thank you for sharing this, it truly does help us women who are also struggling..

    9. tiffany dollarhyde

      You are SO brave! God has plans for you and he will always guide you and give you a path. He has bigger plans for you. Prayers for you and Steven. You guys are going to make wonderful parents. God bless you!

    10. BettyBlu

      Love you Desi. Your brave and beautiful, inside and out. What is meant to be, will be. You'll have a family and be a great Mom...no matter how it happens. I wish you so much happiness. xo

    11. Elizabeth Blanford

      The book "Life Changing Foods" by Anthony Williams has a section on infertility and foods to get pregnant and having a healthy pregnancy

      1. Henok Tesfom

        Nope he is not a medical professional

    12. Angel Franks

      Dear Lord Jesus Christ I am coming to you oh Lord and I’m asking you to let Desi Perkins to be able to give birth to a child and get to knew what the true meaning what true love really is when she holds her on child in her on arms and her and her husband get that beautiful gift from you dear Lord you said that if I come to you in your name my Farther Lord Jesus Christ that you will bless them with a beautiful baby one of the other or both a boy and a girl babies and I say this again in your name my Farther Lord Jesus Christ amen 🙏.

    13. Angel Franks

      Desi you are not by your self I also lost a baby a very long time ago and I didn’t even know that I was going to have a baby I was in a drug rehab and one day they had me to help take off a tiller off of a truck and after that I started bleeding so very very bad and they had the nerve to tell me that god would take care of it they didn’t even take me to the Hospital to have a DNC done and they didn’t take me they just made me lay in bed and I would have blood from my chin and to my feet I was was covered in blood I cried so much it was so very very hard and after that for a very very long time I thought that I could not have a baby but in 1996 I had my first baby girl and when I saw her I melt I cried of happiness. So I know how you are feeling. I wish you the best I hope one day that you get to have a baby to feel that hole in your heart that you have.

    14. Jeane Alinea

      i love you

    15. Kasey Hall

      I'm so sorry everything will be ok 🤗

    16. Meshia Lattimore

      god bless you and your family.. surrogacy is an option. usually women get pregnant after that..once they stop thinking about it..

    17. Preet Wirring

      This is my first time ever commenting on bloggers or celebrities video (it’s your wish desi what you want to call it either blogger or influencer or celebrity, you are all to me tbh♥️♥️) this video just came from your heart♥️, those tears you were wiping off but in some other situations i have done its same ♥️. Those tears were from core of your heart and I could feel that. I hope desi you get all you want and be mother of a beautiful baby you ever dreamt off♥️. I know you won’t even see the message but always love and blessings for you my beautiful love ♥️♥️♥️♥️. You are someone I can relate too and I don’t know why! Love you always ♥️. I hope you wake upto this coz you deserve this ♥️😂🙏🏻

    18. Sentea Maria Ramona

      God blees you!

    19. shanon dunkelbarger

      This is one of the most awful pain you can feel. I am so so sorry you have to go through this on your journey to mother hood. This just brought me back to my 6 years of infertility and all the heart break I felt during that time the soul crushing pain a negative test brought every month. My prayers are with you. From the ashes comes beauty.

    20. Chuyen Pham

      💔 Thank you for being brave, transparent & inspirational. Most of us look at Steven & Desi as a perfect couple, perfect life, perfect house; Desi has perfect skin, hair, body, etc.. Some just assumed that their life is easier than us. Desi’s honesty in her vulnerable stories truly made me admired how strong & beautiful she is inside out - and it reminded us to be kind to one another - never judging anyone else bc you haven’t known their life stories yet.. The strength that you carry to live your best life , running your JP-news & makeup business; survived and striving through everything with your husband is definitely worth sharing to your fans! Thank you again! You inspired us, Desi! ❤️ Stay strong 🌟

    21. CompleteBeautyTreat

      I heard this theory from a Romanian pop artist that whenever she would want to get pregnant she would go on a long vacation somewhere relaxing and it would happen for her... maybe get away from everything and everyone rent a hut in Mexico somewhere beautiful or air bnb in Hawaii get away for a month and I believed you will get pregnant ... your body needs to feel truly relax ... go there and have fun and be one with nature

    22. Vanessa Alvarez

      I had a hard time getting pregnant for about 6-7 months. I ended up using the clear blue ovulation tests they sell at Walmart. You pee on a stick every day after your period and each day it tells you one of three things: not ovulating, fertile, or ovulating. I got pregnant using these tests. You should try them and see if/ when your ovulating! Good luck💫

    23. Brandy Madison

      I love you desi. I never have suffered a miscarriage but I have been trying for 5 years. I no everything ur feeling besides miscarrying and I am very sorry and I can’t imagine how heartbreaking that was. But moving on with fertility treatment has helped me. For me I have PCOS and I do not ovulated on my own. Idk if it will help with you but if fertility medicine/treatments/steps doesn’t work you will know more of where you are in this situation. Like just accepting for sure what is happening and what you can and can’t do. I know it’s scary and your afraid and I no how much it hurts and if I was by u I would just give u a big hug. And thank you for opening up this just made me take a deep breath of relief knowing someone is out there knowing exactly how it feels. You will b in my thoughts girl. 💙

    24. Samantha Beatty

      Start taking a tbsp of black seed oil everyday!! Changes lives !!

    25. Rashida Duncan

      Have you started trying again? I can totally relate after going through a loss 4 times. It's tough. Hang in there. God knows your heart and will answer your prayers.

    26. DiiView

      I love you so much Desi. I pray your dream comes true ❤️ & you are not alone we do feel you

    27. Amal X

      You're soooo strong for sharing this Desi, you have no idea how much respect I have for you after watching this. Have faith that God has a greater plan for you and everything happens for a reason. When it's your time it's your time and it is predestined

    28. Jen Morris

      I didn’t see this video at the time but Desi you are an amazing woman! You will have a family and you will be the most amazing Mom one day!! All of these tears and hardships will be worth it x

    29. Romy Noack

      NEVER give up. Believe in and it will be happen one day. your such a wonderful lovely person, one day you get what you want, for sure. many kisses and hugs 2u

    30. Leonore Del Valle

      Good luck mama, i hope everything turns out well for the both of you! Keep your head up, it will happen.

    31. becky jones

      You are very brave and vulnerable right now. Keep Hope alive. I went through so much pain and so many treatments for years before giving birth finally 2 weeks before my 45th birthday. I lost his twin, but my boy is now a beautiful 6 year old angel. This will happen to you. Prayers to you.

    32. breezybb

      Can you please do a follow up to this video? I am kind of going through the same thing at the moment and would love to hear how this is turning out for you.

    33. V V.

      Don’t buy into the online JP-news audience “pseudo love”. We don’t know you like that. We like your videos because it feeds our vanity- it gives us tools to be more vain and more superficial in the name of “beauty” - and in turn it feeds your need for acceptance, relativity and human approval. (God how wretched we are!) shut this world out and find true life and perhaps you will become a mother ready to show your child that life isn’t ...this!

    34. Lupita Bee

      It breaks my heart hearing this. No one should ever experience a miscarriage. I pray you get blessed with a child one day❤️ Even Miracles take a little time.

    35. Tiffany Thornton

      OMG, Desi! You are so BRAVE. You are so Courageous! You are helping so many people. Keep praying, Desi. And did you know Gabrielle Union and Dwane Wade had trouble getting pregnant and they recently had a baby? Keep the hope alive. Read Gabrielle's book, "We need more wine." She talks about her journey to having a baby. Your not alone. Keep your head up!!!

    36. Medicine and Mascara

      I know you probably won’t see this, but I feel your struggle. I have been there and know how hard it is. You are not alone, I am praying for you 💛 it will happen!

    37. Karina Van der Woodsen

      She kinda reminds me of Jennifer Lopez , both strong and beautiful women who build their own emipres! 😍🙌🏻🔥

    38. familia g'Z

      Put your trust and faith in the Lord he listens🙏

    39. Miljana Lakovic

      You are such a nice person. I wish you all the best in life, thank you, you stopped my circle of opssesive thinking about this subject, like I think that every women one day become you in this, for everything you want, it doesnt matter if its baby, or health or whatever. I hope that you are in a new place right now in your mind. Thank you, if it means something to you, this was very healing for me. ♥️

    40. Sofia Isaksson

      Thank you for sharing. Sending prayers.

    41. Joy Desi

      My mother had 7 miscarriages until she had me, at 42. That’s why she named me Joy. Desi I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. You have no idea how much my heart hurts for you and Steven. Keep praying and keep trying, god has his way with life. Your baby will come to you when the time is right, not saying you’ll have a child at 42 but I think you get what I’m saying. I love you desi. So so much.

    42. April Little

      Bless your sweet heart. It's the hardest thing in the world. The wanting can become painful. The disappointment overwhelming. Faith and hope can become so hard to maintain - even they can become painful. Sometimes you have to just let others carry you, have the faith for a while while you rest. If you want a family, God will make a way. It may not be the timing or the way you think. His plan is often not your plan. As long as your heart is open and ready, children will enter in. ❤ Prayers for your peace until your time comes.

    43. Laura Pendleton

      Honey, I know it's hard, I've been there I know this was 6 months so I hope you're already on the path. Don't waste any more time. Get every test you need, they will get you pregnant. If your doctor says you don't need a certain test, find a new doctor. I'll pray for you.

    44. Payre Shaikh


      1. Payre Shaikh


    45. Elana Wildstein

      this is amazing. you are amazing. this is what resilience is

    46. Meme Queen

      I’m in bed now because i just had a miscarriage at 11 weeks . I’m in so much pain emotionally and physically and honestly i had to come back to see this . May god bless you with a baby Desi

    47. TaylorAmelia

      Omg bawling. Took me 9 yrs to get pregnant with my boy who's now my best friend. He's almost 7 months old now. It can take a looooong time but pls don't be discouraged ❤️ ILY. You deserve to have a magic baby too

    48. Marisa P

      I’m a rainbow baby after 5 years Desi ! My mom has me at 35 it will happen don’t stress about it ! I just got diagnosed with endo and I feel the same way you so bc I don’t know if I can have kids and I’m already 27 and doctors and my family are pressuring me. But I am taking it day by day and leave it in God’s hands. You are amazing and thank you for this it’s amazing what our body’s go through as women. You will get through this !

    49. Zoe Goodman

      The both of you are in my thoughts. I’m hoping that it happens when the time is right and that the whole journey is a healthy and positive one for you and your family going forward. Xx Zoe

    50. Ecem

      My mom and dad tried for 8 years, never give up!

    51. charleefr

      *When you relate too much to find the words to comment...* 😓

    52. taylor watson

      I feel maybe the struggle was to eventually make this video and help others and now that it’s out I really feel like you might get your wish ❤️❤️❤️ the most amazing thing we can do is help each other and support even if it’s not a pregnancy issue everyone has there own struggles in some way that can really effect them. Love you desi thank you for this 🙏🏼

    53. Eva Agelopoulos

      Thank you, Desi. I needed this right now. ❤️

    54. Elizabeth Perez

      Thank you so much for sharing your story, Desi. I just lost my baby girl at 29 weeks of pregnancy and I am completely devastated. I have no words for what I have had to experience in addition to the the delivery and postpartum care. It’s stories like yours that make me feel like I’m not alone and that there are so many people going through similar experiences that are able and willing to support each other. Many people suffer in silence and it’s so unfair. We need to continue sharing our stories in order to help each other get through these difficult moments. Again, thank you so much for using your platform to help others. It has helped me.

    55. butterfly6199

      I am sorry for what happened to you Desi, I truly do understand and feel your pain. I have a son, but I had 9 miscarriages throughout the years after I had my son who is now 19 years old. I think it is something you will never ever get over it because I am still sad and left without closure since my last miscarriage 5 years ago. I know we don't want to hear it, but things DO happen for a reason, just trust God and pray a lot. Good luck to you and your husband.... :(

    56. Sumieh Abidali

      So brave of you to share this. It is very comforting for those who have the same struggle to see that even successful women like yourself can have this struggle. It will happen for you!

    57. Mia B

      The universe is in your side Desi 🤞

    58. Daniela Anguiano

      Sending you so much love and hope beautiful ❤️❤️

    59. I M A QYN

      Cosmetics, especially lipsticks have a lot of lead which causes infertility and overall toxicity in the body. That is probably the cause.

    60. Vaishnavi Singh

      I wish Desi you see this comment... Just wanted to tell you that there is a Dr. from India... Her name is Dr. Shalini... She made a medicine which made around a 60 women conceive and all of those were successful... She also sell it one amazon... If you are reading this comment please try to contact Dr. Shalini on instagram... At least just try once... I really really wish you could see this... Or else I can only wish that may god bless you with an angel baby 😢

    61. Stephanie A Morales

      That sucks because you and your husband would be incredible parents since you two love each other so much that chid would be extremely happy and loved, while there’s many children floating around without a care in the world from their parents

    62. muafaith_

      bless your heart. i wish you and steven the best of luck, both of you will make amazing parents. let go and let God

    63. Jojo Swindells

      My heart aches for your pain you been through. Sending so much love ❤️❤️ xx

    64. Carolina Dwyer

      I know this won’t make you feel better. I tried for 3 years had 3 miscarriages. I know the feeling and is so hard and lonely and depressing. We went to see a specialist and we were both healthy and good. So keeping the story short. I have two beautiful healthy girls now and I can’t explain why this whole thing happened to us but everything happens for a reason. Don’t loose hope. Thinking of you ❤️

    65. Sandy-Olivas Martinez

      Pray to St. Gerard Mejella.

    66. Diyana H

      You are so strong for even posting this 😭 this broke my heart. Im actually crying right now. I pray it happens for you & Steven real soon. Please dear Lord 🙏❤️

    67. nessasmiles

      Only 3 minutes in and my heart is absolutely breaking for you. I can’t imagine what what it’s like and pray that it happens for you ❤️❤️

    68. Aman Kaur

      All the power in the world to you! You shared this VERY personal experience and wishing you all the best. Sending you the best vibes and stay strong through your journey!

    69. Kiyanna Beauty

      Desi, you’re so gorgeous inside and out 💕

    70. Alyssa martin

      bless your soul desi. i pray for you and steven so hard to create a family. this breaks my heart but you are SO strong for opening up about this.

    71. Macy A

      Thank you for making this Desi, this really helped me in my own struggles and you are not alone. Blessings will come.

    72. Khaula S

      i can tell you slowed the speed of this video down... it's obvious

    73. samirakoda

      I needed to see this..am going through the same thing.. just yesterday I was crying because I found out that I lost my pregnancy.. I understand what you are going through

    74. Anthi Sara

      I really appreciate that you shared that with us! It helps a lot of people. Sharing after all is caring! Just relax...Try Yoga, Meditation and massage therapy to release stress or any stiffness from your body! Let your body relax in your husband's hug! Sometimes things happen when you least expect it. A friend of mine was trying 10 years to get pregnant! She gave up at 40 and to heal the pain she started yoga, meditation, reading books about self improvement, and warm castor oil compress. And then at 40 she got pregnant .....twins!!! A boy and a girl! Doctor said that it happens cause subconsciously trying to get pregnant puts your body on pressure. Let go and it will come when you least expect it! Love you!!! 😍😘

    75. chikbomgarden

      Watched this Video 5 months ago with my wish to get pregnant! 5 months later im over my first miscarriage! Im ok with that its just the wish not to explain to everyone why im not pregnant ect. Its not that its a tabu thema but its so private! So please stop asking! Wish you the best desi ❤

    76. Cherly Gonzalez

      Truly, this is probably one of the most amazing things I've seen on youtube because it hits so very close to home. I am personally dealing with fertility issues and have been trying with my husband for over 2 years now with not one pregnancy. I have been working on starting a lifestyle blog but can't seem to get myself to truly go through with it because I know that if I want it to be authentic to me and my life id have to speak about this extremely sensitive topic. I don't yet have the strength to go into details about it so have just put that goal on pause in the meantime. watching this gives me hope that sooner rather than later I'll be as brave as you in being able to speak about my pain through this process. Thank You so very much.

    77. Ha Pham

      Hi Desi, i dont normally leave comments but I came upon this video and I felt so incline to help you during this difficult time. I'm currently a student doing rotation in x-ray. We have a procedure called Hysterosalpingogram(HSG). A procedure that allows contrast to spill into the Fallopian tube and perhaps it might help open a closed tube. Please look into this procedure to help with your journey. A lot of women who are trying are seeking this procedure. I hope this help you! bless your heart!

    78. Xenia M.

      Desi, you and Steve are young. Have faith, you will have a big family, do not give up on that dream. Visit an infertility specialist, or 2 or 3, find one you can trust and all will be well! Sending you lots of good wishes!

    79. Aileen Matos

      Your amazing desi 😭💜 keeping you and Steven in my prayers 🙏🏾🙏🏾

    80. sharmin hossain mitul

      I m praying for you....that someday you r going to be pregnant and a good nice mom

    81. Lindsay Sper

      Also, you should look in to vaginal steaming

    82. Kentessa4eva

      I have struggled too... for many years and I experienced a miscarriage 3 years ago and I am still grieving. I chose to allow the miscarriage to happen naturally which resulted in 1 month of pain and an emergency vacuum procedure as all the tissue did not pass. My husband was not understanding of the effect of all this on me and I truly felt alone when all this happened. He would act as if I was never pregnant and I was being over-dramatic. I have felt so much pressure to live up to others expectations of having kids and I get very upset when people pry and start with the "when are you having children" questions. Most ask despite knowing about my miscarriage and our problem conceiving.... Lately, I dunno what it is but I am afraid to even try again knowing my husband may probably be unsupportive and I will be on miscarriage watch and bed rest. So many years have passed without another pregnancy happening that I have gone back on the pill. This whole experience has now made me question if I am meant and if I still want children.

    83. Marilynn Martinez

      Des, it’s been years since I’ve actually had time to sit down a see a video of yours! I’ve always love how down to earth and have always been drawn to your energy. I guess only people who have been through miscarriage really understands how saddening it is. In a lot of your videos I always noticed that there was always a little sadness in your eyes and i knew it due to your miscarriage. What people don’t see it’s that going through something like that, it changes people. Not because you want it that way, but a little of you dies with each disappointment. Im glad you were brave enough to speak about this sensitive subject and let our your thoughts and feelings. Mark my words, you will have a family. Just be patient and don’t lose faith. Good things happen with the time is right. Sending so much wellness to you. 2019 will be YOUR year✨


      doll...... try God I was once you, but I prayed and cried to God like and a baby and now I am mommy of awesome boy he is now 15 and there not a day that goes by were I am not thankful for my son....trust me GOD is awesome !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    85. Katia Contreras

      Thank you for making this Desi, you are so strong and you will be an amazing mother one day. As will I and everyone who is struggling in silence, God is with us he knows when the time is right. ❤️

    86. DesanaRose

      I'm literally living this right now😞😢. I'm so discouraged and sad. Maybe I needed to see this. Praying you and I both.

    87. Aubree Ryan

      I don’t know how many times I can say thank you for making this video. Thank you thank you thank you. I know it’s such a hard thing to talk about because I’m there right now going through it and all I can say is thank you. I needed this.

    88. Natalie Taylor

      You are so brave and so courageous. Thank you for making this video. Keep trusting in Gods plan for you and Steven. I pray he would bless you and you would feel comfort through this xx

    89. Crystal Lim

      If you can't get pregnant, it doesn't mean you can't have a family - there's always surrogacy or adoption as options as well

    90. Tracy Zheng Brooks

      Desi, I have been watching your videos for years and this is by far the closest I feel with you. Me and my husband have been together for 8 yrs now and still no kids. It’s so hard when people or family to ask if you were going to kids or not. To the point I just start telling people that I don’t want kids. I think that is my way of protecting myself from feeling depressed about it. But deep down I really do. Now I just just tell myself it will come when God thinks im ready. Don’t feel pressured that you have to announce anything to the internet. Keep it light and stress free is the most important thing. :)

    91. TheLittle599

      May Jehovah God continue to bless you my prayers are with you you can check Justin and Rachelle channel or Phil and Alex channel you have 2 different points of view and out comes keep going to the doctors and do every test you have to it will all work out

    92. Reshma Patel

      Dear God bless this lovely beautiful soul with a child - there's always a reason behind everything that happens Desi - stay positive and if having a child is the best for your highest good, your higher self than God will never keep it from you... Just keep the faith that when the time is right it will happen. God keeps you from certain things as we all have experiences we need to go through. Staying positive and having faith can turn anything around. Ask for it and then release all fears and just expect - trust me it works being this way and you can truly have all that you want... God bless you and your partner, I wish you all that you desire xxx

    93. Angy Jimenez

      I know it’s not for everyone but you should really consider getting a surrogate i am a surrogate going on my second time doing this and the happiness the couples feel when they see the baby it’s so rewarding we give the gift of Life to couples that can’t have kids and the baby would still be 100% yours

    94. Makeupbyyaya

      😭😭😭 God will give you all the desires of your heart Desi.. ♥️♥️♥️ God’s time is always perfect.

    95. Stephanie De La Cruz

      I have so much respect for you for making this video Desi, you are so brave for putting this out in public because you definitely did not have to. I will keep you and Steven in my prayers so that he sends that sweet angel your way. Stay strong and positive Desi, God has a plan for everyone. ❤️ ilysm

    96. Siayonna Chhan

      The day you uploaded this video, I was getting ready and I remember refreshing JP-news to see new uploads and this one popped up. I was so excited because I thought it was another tutorial, vlog, or something, until I read the title.. and I remember my heart hurting for you. Now I’m watching this video again because I found out today I’m going through a miscarriage and watching/ listening to you doesn’t make me feel alone ): I pray that you & I become mommy’s one day!!

    97. Lynn Lattouf

      I will pray for you and Steven Desi. Please don't be nervous, it sometimes takes decades to be blessed with a child. Don't give up!

    98. Shararah Rayen

      girl you will have a beautiful child and many more lol

    99. Adriana Loor

      This broke my heart😔wishing you the best

    100. Karolina perez perez

      Oh my dear Desi, I love u so much you have no idea .... thank u for being strong, even if you don’t realize it ❤️